It’s tricky to know how to travel as a couple without wanting to kill each other. When on vacation, emotions are heightened, expectations are at an all-time high, and the usual buffers that give you space don’t exist.

It can be challenging, to say the least.

But remembering these seven simple tips will have your vacation looking like a 90’s romcom instead of a dreaded slasher film.

Plan Together

I get it. One of you is the planner and the other is… well… not.

But even though one of you may be doing the lion’s share of the work, it’s important to plan your vacation together. By doing so, you can talk about what type of trip you want to have (adventure vs. leisure, busy vs. relaxing) and set the right expectations from the start.

Discuss what you each want to get out of your vacation, and then compromise!

Are there certain activities your partner wants to do? Is there something you’re dying to see? Would you like to bounce around while they prefer to stay in one place?

By planning together there are no unwelcome surprises and you both have a vested interest in the trip.

Expectation vs. Reality

When imagining your dream vacation, you probably envision strolling through cobblestone streets hand-in-hand while conversing about your shared love for gelato. Throw in a few twinkling stars and a soft, floral-scented breeze and you’ve got yourself some romance.

But expectation is sometimes far from reality.

Years of watching Meg Ryan, Reese Witherspoon, and Kate Hudson have led us to believe that life is a series of perfect moments wrapped up in a super stylish bow. That quirky happenstance ends with gazing into each others’ eyes while a mysterious orchestra plays on in the background.

Let’s get real.

Life is never going to be as ideal as your Instagram feed would have you believe. So accept the imperfection, laugh, and move on.

Know Each Other’s Habits

Those I’ve traveled with tend to think I’m not human. Getting two hours of sleep before another day of extreme sightseeing? No problem! Walking 10+ miles fueled by nothing but a croissant? Meh, who needs food. 14-hour flights without getting up to use the restroom? Seems healthy enough. (Spoiler alert – it’s super not healthy, so I don’t recommend it!)

But I realize most people need food, sleep, and restroom breaks when traveling, so I try to plan accordingly. And when traveling as a couple, it’s important to recognize each other’s habits to avoid frustration.

If you’re an early riser but your sweetie isn’t exactly a morning person, let them sleep! Use the time to grab breakfast or a relaxing cup of coffee. If you prefer quick snacks on the go but your significant other is more of a foodie, try finding a few delectable eateries and indulge!

Old habits die hard, and just because you’re half a world away doesn’t mean your other half will spontaneously morph into your twinsie. Realize you may have different ways of doing things and embrace them! It’s an essential aspect of how to travel as a couple without killing each other.

Spend Time Apart

We all know those couples who embody relationship goals. The inseparable two that finish each other’s sentences and eat like that scene from Lady & the Tramp. You know the one where they share the same spaghetti noodle that ends in a kiss? Exactly.

But for the other 98% of us, spending every waking moment together is a recipe for disaster.

I love my fella. I really do. But after two weeks bouncing around Europe attached at the hip we were starting to grate on each other’s nerves. It wasn’t until the last day when he went to take a nap (one of his habits) and I went to take hundreds of pictures (one of my habits) that it clicked – time apart makes the time with each other better!

Even though you’re on vacation together, it’s ok to spend time on your own. It will give you both the space you’d typically have at home so the time spent together is that much sweeter.

Put Down the Technology

This is a good rule of thumb in general, but especially on vacation. It’s tempting to want to check emails or see what everyone else is up to on social media (FOMO, much?) And there’s certainly downtime to do that.

But when you’re traveling as a couple, try to limit time on your cell phones and spend quality time with each other instead. Have a conversation. Share an experience. Reconnect.

After all, you didn’t leave home so you could be glued to a screen, did you?

Communication is Key

The number one thing to know about how to travel as a couple is communication. When traveling together, it’s important to be upfront with how you’re feeling. Is something bothering you? Do you want to eat somewhere else? Or participate in a different activity? Don’t be afraid to speak up!

Talk about issues that come up on the road, and then work together to find a solution you can both agree on. That way, you’re not letting things fester until you blow up at them for using your towel when you’re actually upset that he takes so long getting ready to leave.

In the end, communication and problem-solving will bring you that much closer.

Relax!

Inevitably, things aren’t going to be perfect. Despite all your careful planning, flights will be delayed, hotels will be less than desirable, and reservations will be lost. When that happens, lean on each other and laugh it off!

Remember that a bad day on vacation is still better than a good day at the office! Take a breath, and then work together to turn lemons into a lemon drop martini.

Are April showers putting a damper on your perfect Parisian holiday? Paris has some of the best museums, and there’s nothing more romantic than kissing in the rain! Is the heat not working in your hotel room? Sounds like the perfect excuse for a snuggle fest!

Just take a breath and use the adversity to bring you closer together.